Last night we had pizza and movie night with Eby and Wogayu. The girls were gone for the evening, so it was only four of us; it felt so odd!
I didn’t love Despicable Me 3 (I’m not sure I even liked it), but the scene of the “dance fight” struck me as very funny. When the movie ended I challenged Wogayu to a dance fight – he thought I was kidding, but then I started doing a goofy dance and he looked at me like I was crazy. We all started laughing and somehow I got even sillier and dancing got – well, worse.
Russ pulled me close saying, “It makes me happy to see you like this.”
I looked at his eyes and felt a rush of love – it’s possible for us to feel happy. Our hearts are capable of being light.
With kids from “hard places,” we often feel the weight of our lives. We tend to be focused on the challenges and what needs to happen next. And as parents who have lost a child, sadness always swims around us.
More than three years ago I wrote, Smile More. Hug More. Be a Little Silly.
This morning I read it again and remembered the importance of this for our children. They need to feel our delight over them, especially when it may seem our attention is focused on instruction and correction.
It may not seem like much, but having pizza and watching a movie each Friday is a small step toward lightening up. I’m also trying to be more playful, which doesn’t come naturally to me. I bought Suspend and Banagrams because they require minimal setup and can be played quickly – my kind of games.
The thing about joy is we need to want it.
Don’t choose to stay in darkness under a blanket of grief; look for glimpses of light.
Our kids need us to seek joy and lead them to it.
They also need to know we enjoy them and they are “fun to be around,” which is one of our goals for the younger set.
Sometimes (not often enough) we watch goofy YouTube videos just to enjoy laughing side-by-side. Like this one [caution: sexual references at about 5:00 if you want to mute.]
Or maybe this will do the trick.
With parental censorship, there is no end to the humor you’ll find on YouTube.
Let’s lighten up and laugh with our kids.
There is a time for everything… a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance… Ecclesiastes 3
We’ve done a lot of weeping and mourning; let’s laugh and dance with our families.
I send you my love this morning, along with joy and hope for the journey.