Tuesday Topic: Your Most Dangerous Prayer?

It has been far too long since I’ve posted a Tuesday Topic and I’ve missed hearing your thoughts.

Isaiah, my son and blog boss, asked the question, 

 “What is the most dangerous prayer you’ve ever prayed?”

Now that is a great question. What prayer, when honestly prayed, put your plans, goals, or ideal life at the greatest risk of change by a glorious God?  Don’t be shy – leave a comment and share your answer – we want to hear from you.  You can even be anonymous if you like.

I would love a new collection of Tuesday Topics; any question is welcome!  In the past we’ve covered questions related to adoption, parenting, large families, faith, HIV, special needs adoption, challenging behaviors, and all kinds of things I can’t recall at the moment.

Email your topics/questions to me at lisa@onethankfulmom.com  If you put “Tuesday Topic” in the subject line, that will help.

Thanks for sharing the journey with me.

Lisa

 

 

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Let me introduce myself. Russ and I are the parents of twelve children by birth and adoption, and sometimes more through foster care. I'm the creator of One Thankful Mom which has been as much of a gift to me as to my readers. In 2011 I became a TBRI® Pracitioner* and have lived and breathed connected parenting ever since. I'm deeply honored to be the co-author, together with the late Dr. Karyn Purvis, of The Connected Parent; it is her final written work. I love speaking at events for adoptive and foster parents. I'm also the co-founder of The Adoption Connection, a podcast and resource site for adoptive moms. I mentor and encourage adoptive moms so you can find courage and hope in your journeys of loving your children well.

35 Comments

  1. amy
    March 20, 2012

    To use me up. To use my children up – which is a harder prayer.

    Reply
  2. anon
    March 20, 2012

    I prayed for truth to be revealed once, knowing full well that I didn't really want to acknowledge that truth. Scary, but God gave me a promise through scripture (literally shoving my head into His Word) that He would turn my mourning into joy, before He revealed what had been hidden. And then He healed me. Tough, tough year. I haven't prayed for truth since.

    Reply
  3. Jolé
    March 20, 2012

    Several prayers come to mind but the first one was this: when my daughter was in kindergarten she asked if I would homeschool her. At the time I thought that was a CRAZY idea. After some prompting of the Lord, I started to pray "Lord, if this is Your will then please change my heart." I prayed that prayer for about a year and a half. All the while He slowly changed my heart and I became willing. Then my prayer was "Lord, please Let my husband be willing and allow this to come about without my prompting it."
    This is our 3rd year of homeschooling our 2 youngest girls, 4th & 5th grade. Even though my ideal life has gone, I now know this was definitely the plan He had. Because of that I'm greatly blessed!

    Reply
  4. unconventionalwomanhood
    March 20, 2012

    For God to make me into the woman He created me to be.

    Reply
  5. Mama D's Dozen
    March 20, 2012

    "Lord, how many children do you want us to have?" Never in our wildest dreams would we have thought the answer would be in the double digits. 🙂

    "Lord, do you want us to adopt an older sibling group?" In retrospect, life was EASY when we ONLY had 10 children. We had absolutely no idea how difficult life would get when we said "yes" to adoption. But, we know that we know that we know … that the LORD called us to this life.

    Reply
  6. Johnna
    March 20, 2012

    Prayed for wisdom in making the decision to foster.
    This turned into adoption.
    Our older kids were grown and out of the home at this time. We started a new family at an older age and wouldn't change a thing. Can't imagine our lives any other way.
    Certainly wasn't the way I thought I would be spending my days at this point in my life but God had a much better plan for us!

    Reply
  7. Anna
    March 20, 2012

    "Lord, if you want us to move across the country (in our new marriage, with our newborn baby) we will." We kinda thought He was just testing us, like Abraham. Turned out He was sending us, like Jonah.

    Reply
  8. nora
    March 20, 2012

    I honestly don't ask God scary questions anymore. Whatever I ask, He answers in the extraordinary oppostie. I'm sure that for some that's when you don't want to hear the answer, and maybe this is the case, but I feel like if I pray for something, then the opposite is the direct result. "God please let m baby be healthy." She was born with seizures and given 2 weeks to live. "God please keep my child in Guatemala safe." She came home after being abused as an infant. I'm sure that more faithful people have better answers, but I'm too timid to pray again.

    Reply
    1. charity
      March 21, 2012

      nora, your thoughts made me think alot today, about how we pray. as mothers, aren't your prayers always our first prayers? we always begin at a place where we ask god to give us children, and to watch over our children. and then in the living of it all, our prayers change, and we ask different things of God…we ask him to give us strength, to walk with us in darkness, to watch over our children in their trials. This life is a time for learning,, to withstand the refiner's fire. The greatest crucible I know of is family life, but also the greatest safe haven, the greatest joys and the greatest trials, magnified by the fact that we love each other.
      Might I suggest a prayer for THIS day? Pray to know that God loves you. Pray to feel His love for you in the tender mercies that He sends into your life. Pray to feel His hand lifting you up through each trial. Because He does love you even when the answers to your prayers don't make sense to you today. A lifetime of praying has taught me that.

      Reply
    2. annonomous
      March 21, 2012

      my heart feels crushed in my chest reading this…i don't think to myself, or say to others that i don't pray, but i don't. i'm not mad, i do feel hopeless. there is a bit of 'what's the point' going on in my head but for the most part i can't get any words to come out of my mouth. i don't know that i can pinpoint times when God has done the opposite of what i've prayed but i have been lost in the desert… alone…and wandered hungry and thirsty…and perished…and been torn apart and consumed by scavengers…and left as a pile of dry bones. and these dry bones love God, and trust Him and praise Him. i just don't know how to form the words to say to Him. what i do do is serve, because i can see pain, utter tragedy on peoples faces. hurt people, people who've known troubles can see troubles. we can bless God for that. there are people like us who need people like us. a person i admire in the faith said they'd pray God would show me His loving kindness for ME. i will pray the same for you.

      Reply
      1. Cara
        March 22, 2012

        How can you say you don't pray? That was a beautiful prayer. God wants to hear your heart. You shared it vividly with us – you have the words to share it with him.

        Reply
    3. Julie
      March 23, 2012

      Nora, I have wrestled with some of this, too. I've been thinking about blogging about some of my thoughts and understanding of these hard questions for some time now. Maybe this is my cue to get moving. 🙂

      Reply
  9. anonymous
    March 20, 2012

    I cried out to God to show me the way…… Our family was being ripped to shreds, I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown, and we desperately needed a solution. I had tried and tried to find my own way, and then submitted to His will and literally in tears begged Him to show me the way – and He did. The way is not necessarily what I imagined when we started down this path of adoption, but when I gave it all to Him to solve he provided a solution as if by Divine delivery. I have hope for healing and a positive future for our little girl where I had none before asking for His help.

    Reply
  10. Rachel Rausch
    March 20, 2012

    LORD do whatever it takes for our family to follow you!

    Reply
  11. Fiona
    March 21, 2012

    My now husband and I were missionaries in Kenya. Both single. I was due to return home and my husband was to stay another 2 years. We had "dated" 4 times and we agreed to pray for a week while he was up country and I was in Nairobi, about whether we should continue to date once I returned home in a few weeks. Every day I would pray and God would say very clearly "when he asks you to marry him, say yes". I thought my emotions and romantic notions were getting the better off me, I mean we had literally had 4 dates and all of them with others present, never alone. I hardly knew him, and I was going home to Ireland and he was from the US. The next weekend he came back to Nairobi and asked me what God had said to me… I suggested he should go first. He asked me to marry him and I said yes! 18 years ago. BTW he didn't want to ask me any more than I wanted to say yes. It was completely God's idea and a perfect one as usual!

    Reply
  12. Giann
    March 21, 2012

    That God would break me. Tear the walls of my heart down. And He has. Even though I hate the process, I am ever so thankful for that prayer!

    Reply
  13. Lori
    March 21, 2012

    My heart just breaks for Nora's comment. I feel the pain behind her words. God is a God of love and He is the One Who is faithful, not me. He knows what is best for us. His love, His best for us, is to make us more like Christ, not to give us a pain free life. My kids will ask me, "Does God always answer our prayers?" I say yes, He does always answer our prayers, but He does not always answer yes. ….. From my own experience I will say that God has always answered my prayers, but not in the way that I thought was best. Oh, I like to think I know better than God, silly me! But, I have learned to pray in a different way – for His will and for His sufficiency. Very early in our marriage when I was longing for more babies I prayed begging God to give us another child. It was not in His plan for us. Years went by and suddenly our two children were teenagers! How does that happen? 🙂 Then, our world caved in. Our fourteen year old son died. It felt like the end of everything. But God reminded me of that yearning for more children and the talks that my husband and I had had about adoption. We decided, why not?! We have now adopted three older children and have a home bursting with life and love. Oh, don't get me wrong! There have been many very rough days (and still are!) and yet we have never questioned that this is what God wanted for us. We have learned more about the nature and character of God than we ever would have if our lives had sailed along as WE wanted them to.

    Reply
  14. Kasey
    March 21, 2012

    Break my heart for what breaks his….

    Reply
  15. anon
    March 21, 2012

    i prayed a prayer for confirmation of my decision to leave infidelity, and got His answer that I was called to stay and nourish my marriage…then i prayed a prayer to survive it, and was given strength i didn't know i had to stand up under the strains…then i prayed a prayer to be able to breathe again, and after a few years i realized one day i was….then i prayed a prayer to be able to trust again, and learned the One i needed to trust was God….Today's prayer is to ask for His gift of feeling love for someone who is still mortal, and thus, untrustworthy, imperfect, and hard to love. 13 years later, 6 children later, much life later, i still find my lifeline in prayer, my hand in my husbands, and His…grateful for unexpected answers to the hard prayers. nervous for children growing up and going into their own lives and the world, knowing His answers to their hard prayers will also be unexpected.

    Reply
    1. Mandy
      March 21, 2012

      I had chills as I read through you comment, Anon. Beautiful.

      Reply
    2. anon
      March 24, 2012

      Thank you for this.

      I am 14 months out of discovery of my husband's infidelity. The Lord told me to stay … but it is still HARD. I am still praying to be able to breathe, some days.

      Reply
  16. Lori
    March 21, 2012

    I prayed for God to heal me to my core and I would follow him any where….a few months earlier my husband and I were told we could not have our own children and we decided not to persue adoption-specifically US adoption for fear of not being chosen from a match book because we were "too old"(at the time my husband was 49 and I was 41. The Lord literally the next day put me in contact with a friend who was going n a medical mission to rural Ethiopia that was going to perform 50 corrective prolapse ureterus surgeries. She was going to raise the money, $7,500, to help the team cover the costs. I was grieving not being a mom and feeling like an outsider with the women in my life and during my sleepless nights of grieving the loss of being a mother and feeling like an outsider with all of the moms in my life, I began praying for the 50 women who would have these surgeries. God spoke to me in a sft whisper and said "help". Long story short, my girl friend and I organized and put out first live and silent auction together in 6 weeks and the Lord blessed us with raising $10,000!! He also blessed me with having someone sponsor my trip on this mission where He opened my heart to adopting! Nineteen months after returning from this mission trip, my husband and I brought home our beautiful baby boy!!!!

    Reply
  17. Leslee Matthews
    March 21, 2012

    oh, that is a good one. I have been praying for more loving relationships in my family. Wow! has God been answering….but not without much unrest. He doesn't answer our prayers for change without that change causing a some discomfort. Sometimes quite a LOT! I never thought that was a dangerous prayer….we usually don't….

    Reply
  18. Hannah G
    March 21, 2012

    I can think of no prayer more dangerous than, "Not my will but Your will be done." It's the willingness to accept that God may have plans—greater, better, world-transforming plans—that directly conflict with even my most earnest hopes and desires. To tell God that I am willing to receive "no" as an answer is the most difficult prayer for me to pray. Knowing that Christ, the dearly loved son of God, prayed with agony and bloody sweat to have that cup of suffering pass from him is both a terror and a comfort. God the Father heard His prayer. And yet God the Father's answer was, "No." And that "no" took the form of the cross. If I stop there and see only the suffering and death that came in answer to Jesus' prayer then I might despair. But I cannot forget that the cross of Jesus Christ—the terrible "no" from God the Father—led to the salvation of the world and the triumph over sin and death.

    Reply
    1. charity
      March 22, 2012

      exactly true for me, well spoken….

      Reply
  19. jen anderson
    March 21, 2012

    a great question to contemplate. ill have to do some thinking.

    Reply
  20. Cara
    March 22, 2012

    My most dangerous prayer has been, and continues to be, "Do whatever it takes to make me more like your Son." So far, that has included painful years of infertility, miscarriage, the ups and downs of biological children and adopted children, and plopping me in the middle of the desert in West Africa, to minister to a people who are adamantly opposed to Him.

    Reply
  21. Julie
    March 23, 2012

    Great question! For me, it was something like this… Lord, I want to be consumed by You. Strip me of myself and fill me with You. I want to die to myself, so I might live for Christ.

    Ouch! It's especially painful when I'm in the middle of being selfish.

    Reply
  22. Acceptance with Joy
    March 24, 2012

    Took me awhile to want to post my comment… But I have been thinking about it a lot.

    Three years ago I prayed, "O Christ, give me a little glimpse of the worth of a human soul." There was a story I had read that touched me and the woman's prayer had been this. I decided to make it my own. And LIFE has NEVER BEEN the SAME SINCE!!! WOW! The story warned not to pray this lightly. To quote: "Did you, Christian, ever ask that and mean it? Do not do it unless you are willing to give up ease and selfish pleasure; for life will be a different thing to you after this revelation."

    It's been an amazing and hard journey… but I keep praying the prayer. My life is worth nothing if not for a heart to love.

    Reply
  23. Jillian
    March 25, 2012

    To let us walk the entire journey with Vivace, as our child, in our family…

    Reply
  24. Suze
    March 26, 2012

    This prayer has yet to be answered…and it is a dangerous one for me to pray because I like the known and the comfortable. My prayer is that someday, Lord willing, the Lord will return us to Uganda. Not for a visit…even though this is what I tell people. But to serve in some way. No one in my family knows I pray this, and even tho' I'm posting this comment, I am not using my real name…cuz this prayer is between me and my Lord. And if someday it is answered, Yes, then He and I will have a laugh. And I'll tell my husband I knew all along… ;o)

    Reply
  25. Lydia
    March 29, 2012

    break me. break me so I have to turn to You.
    That pray has hurt so bad but been so good many times.

    Reply
  26. Joanna
    March 30, 2012

    "Your will Lord, not mine." In my heart I knew where He was leading. I knew I had to stop praying for a pregnancy and start praying for what I really wanted….a family. I also prayed that he would make the path clear to me. I was heart broken and very emotional. I didn't want to waste years and money on treatments that I didn't really want anyway. The journey was very hard, 2 babies lost to ectopic pregnancies and then finding out that we were both carriers for Cystic Fibrosis (the CF news was God thumping us on the forehead), but he never wavered,,,and praise God he gave me a good husband to go through all of that with. We became parents through adoption (woking on #2). The journey has changed our lives, softened our hearts, and made our mariage stronger. God really does know what He's doing 🙂

    Reply
  27. VaShona
    August 6, 2017

    I asked my fifteen-year-old daughter Kayla this question. She said that when she was younger, she prayed to God every night for a sister, since she was the only first grader in her class that didn’t have one. At the time she had an older and younger brother. Then, one day, my husband and I announced that we were going to adopt a baby girl from Ethiopia. Her six-year-old self threw her hands up and said “Thank you, God. You finally answered my prayers!” But the Lord works in very mysterious ways. Instead of one girl, we were matched with boy/girl twins. When Kayla found that out, she said “God was thinking of the boys, too. He wanted to make everyone in our family happy.”

    When we came home from Ethiopia with the babies, Kayla told everyone, “I finally have a sister!” She loves both of the twins, but the bond she has with our daughter Hanna is truly amazing. Kayla has always been wise beyond her years. When she held Hanna for the first time, she said “God wanted me to wait for what I prayed for so he could give me something very special. Now I have a sister and another brother.” They are best friends to this day. It goes to show that if you are patient, and let Him do the rest, your prayers can be answered.

    Reply
    1. Lisa Qualls
      August 8, 2017

      That’s beautiful, VaShona. Thank you for sharing your (and your daughter’s) story.

      Reply

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