Look at us! Tuesday Topics two weeks in a row. Did you enjoy reading the responses to last week’s question as much as I did?
Today our question comes from Teresa, who asks,
We have adopted multiple children from a country where birth records are either absent or often inaccurate. Our children are still younger (currently in lower elementary school). In one situation, the birth date seems off by a year and in such a way that it may actually be helpful to repeat a birthday, or to assign a new birthday half-way into the new year.
I’m wondering what the longer term implications of this would be, and if people have seen it as a positive thing or if it is one more confusing thing for these kids who come from hard places. One concern I have is that they already come with such little information about their past, and this seems to be one more strong reminder—annually, that no-one really KNOWS who they are.
I have also heard that it is very difficult to legally change the age of a child, and not worth it. So, I’d be curious to have some feedback: Is it better to just keep children in these situations at a grade that is “age appropriate” and not mess with their age, or to have an official birth age (what is on the birth certificate) + a real birth age (what we think is more accurate), when the situation feels a bit glaringly strange—that a child could not possibly be the age their birth certificate says they are.
If you’ve been around international adoption for long, you know what a challenge this can be.
How about you? Are your children’s birth dates pretty close to accurate? Off by many years?
What have you done, if anything, to change/correct your children’s ages?
I would love to hear your thoughts – no matter how small. Leave a comment and let’s talk about this.
If you have a question you would like me to present as a Tuesday Topic, please email it to me at email@example.com; please put “Tuesday Topic” in the subject line to help me stay organized.
I honestly have the best readers; you are a wealth of wisdom and experience. Please share your thoughts.
encourage one another,
This post may contain Amazon Affiliate links. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.