Last Friday night was the University Christmas concert and Aunt Michele invited the girls to go. In general, they are excited to go nearly anywhere and do just about anything, and they love Aunt Michele. They also love to stay up past their bedtime, so I thought they would be thrilled.
Kalkidan’s first response was, “Will there be food there?”
“No,” I told her,” It’s a concert where there will be lots of music, but they won’t serve food.”
“But I’ll be hungry.”
“We’re going to have a big dinner before you leave, so I don’t think you’ll be hungry.”
“Can I take a snack?”
Envisioning a granola bar tucked in her pocket, I said, “Sure, that’s a good plan.”
I continued cooking dinner as she went in the pantry to find a snack. She emerged with a gallon ziploc bag containing three granola bars, a small bag of toffee peanuts left over from a road trip, and two Hershey bars, the remnants of summer s’mores, dug out from the back of the cupboard. She explained that she was packing snacks for Claire, Beza, and their friend, too.
Resisting the urge to make her put half of it back, I laughed a little, and said it was fine. I knew she wouldn’t eat much of it (and she didn’t), but I also understood that she felt safer taking her own supply of food.
The trauma of the extreme hunger Kalkidan experienced in her early life has made a deep imprint on her, and that saddens me. But I also feel very proud of Kalkidan. She knows her needs, she has “voice” (or the ability to express her need), and she made a plan for herself by packing her own food. Not only that, she thought of her sisters and friend and packed food for them as well.
That is progress, my friends, true progress.
#521 – 530 giving thanks
walking in the cold with Russ Saturday night
Christmas lights on houses
fellowship around the table at Signe’s house
singing O Come, O Come Emmanuel and God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen after dinner
time spent with Mimi yesterday
friends who ask for help and our joy in serving them
the third Sunday of Advent – one more candle lit on our table
waking early Sunday morning to put a roast in the oven
an early morning email from Sweet Pea
Books that help us understand our children from “hard places”:
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