Last Thursday I said I was going to share my friend’s homework assignment from Deborah. Then life happened, Rusty had his accident, and the post wasn’t written. Before I jump into it, I want to thank each one of you who left a comment for us. We are in awe of the way God protected Rusty from serious harm – he literally has only one tiny cut on his hand.
In other family news, I think I am on the road to recovery from shingles. I’ve had three days of feeling good; we even had friends over for dinner Saturday night. I am thankful!
On to the purpose of this post!
In her book, Attaching in Adoption, Deborah Gray writes about Parent Self-Care Tools for parents who are weary or burned-out from the needs of their children. She gives a list of suggestions that have been favorites of the parents in her practice (p. 308). The very first one, and my friend’s assignment, is called Fifty Pleasures, or as we call it, Fifty Points of Joy.
When parents have begun to be too worn out, it is often because they have spent so much time doing tasks that they have deleted the fun or enjoyable things in their life. I like to see parents make a list of fify items that give them pleasure. These are individual lists…
Every week, each person must attain fifty check marks on the list. Using the same item more than once is permitted.
Initially when my friend told me about the assignment, I thought she said “fifteen points of joy” and that didn’t seem too difficult, but when I asked her again and she said fifty, we both decided it could be a challenge. That is seven joyful tasks each day! Imagine the way that could renew your hope and strength if you could make yourself do it.
I want to try, even if I only do it this week, over Thanksgiving. If enough of my list includes time spent with members of my family, and especially with Russ, I can make it happen — I think.
How about you? Should we try to brainstorm a list of joyful tasks together? I’ll start with the first ten that come to mind.
- 7 or more hours of sleep in one night
- Take a walk with Russ
- Read aloud to my girls – our current read is The Sign of the Beaver.
- Have friends over for dinner
- Read a book of my own that is not adoption-related (I’m having a hard time thinking of one – does Radical count?)
- Make love (I know – a little personal – but the joy benefits are significant.)
- Go to coffee with a friend (anybody want to join me?)
- Bake with my kids
- Set a pretty table
- Watch The Blind Side with our big kids
Your turn. Let’s see how many Points of Joy we can share with one another!
Encourage one another,
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