Love Like Jesus Loves

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Today, I need to love like Jesus loves, with a heart that longs to be like him. I’m not feeling it, but this isn’t about my feelings, it’s about my obedience.

Dimples is coming for a visit this weekend, which is good, and also makes me feel uncertain. She is excited – and I’m tired. The weekend must be planned, because, as you all know, lack of structure leads to anxiety for kids like ours. We’re scheduling time with just the girls Saturday morning, cooking in the afternoon, and a birthday dinner for Samuel on Saturday night. Aunt Michele will come to visit, and the girls’ friend, Happy, will tuck into the schedule somewhere.

So much needs to be accomplished in a short time, yet the more we add in activities, the less it is like our real life. Fun times aren’t usually a challenge for Dimples, it’s the day-to-day of normality that is tough. How to find the balance – that is the question.

Little Man just told me that I am working  as hard as a mom can work – even as hard as a crocodile bites. Yep, it feels a little like that. Motherhood is hard work, which is all the more reason to love like Jesus loves.

Have a great Thursday friends. My day will be better after five dentist appointments this afternoon. Good thing we spread them out over a few days this time!

Lisa

 

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Let me introduce myself. Russ and I are the parents of twelve children by birth and adoption, and sometimes more through foster care. I'm the creator of One Thankful Mom which has been as much of a gift to me as to my readers. In 2011 I became a TBRI® Pracitioner* and have lived and breathed connected parenting ever since. I'm deeply honored to be the co-author, together with the late Dr. Karyn Purvis, of The Connected Parent; it is her final written work. I love speaking at events for adoptive and foster parents. I'm also the co-founder of The Adoption Connection, a podcast and resource site for adoptive moms. I mentor and encourage adoptive moms so you can find courage and hope in your journeys of loving your children well.

0 Comments

  1. Keisha
    March 6, 2014

    🙁 I understand! Praying for strength to find you, & love & peace to surround you.

    Reply
    1. Lisa Qualls
      March 6, 2014

      Thank you, Keisha.

      Reply
  2. Carlee
    March 6, 2014

    Then practicing "normal" activities seems like the way to go. If nothing else, it'll demonstrate whether Dimples has learned whatever it is she needs to learn to come home and be safe or not. Walking on eggshells around a kid who is soon to be a full time resident of your home doesn't serve anybody;s interests.

    Reply
    1. Lisa Qualls
      March 6, 2014

      We won't be walking on eggshells, Carlee, just trying to fit in time with the people who love her. It's good stuff, it's just a short visit, so there won't really be time to settle into the mundane. Her visits will be getting longer over the next months, so real life at home will come soon. BTW, thanks for the friendly comment – you caught me by surprise. May you experience kindness and grace today.

      Reply
  3. Luann Yarrow Doman
    March 6, 2014

    Just the fact that you're thinking about how to structure time in the best way for Dimples shows what a good mama you are. Sending love and prayers from Chicago.

    Reply
    1. Lisa Qualls
      March 6, 2014

      Luann, you are so kind. Thank you for your prayers.

      Reply
  4. adventisthomemaker
    March 6, 2014

    "I’m not feeling it, but this isn’t about my feelings, it’s about my obedience."

    Yes. This is hard. 🙂 Lifting your family up in prayer!

    Reply
    1. Lisa Qualls
      March 6, 2014

      Thank you so much.

      Reply
  5. Deborah
    March 6, 2014

    Oh wow – I don't know how you do it Lisa….. I am seriously tired just reading your post. I work full time (beyond full-time to be honest, often working 13 hour days) and I need my weekends to get stuff done and recharge my batteries for another long week I can't imagine how to schedule every moment for just one weekend, much less look at a future (when Dimples comes home) where the new norm is that every moment must be scheduled or lack peace. I am lifting you up in prayer my dear friend…… and looking at in in awe! You are so incredibly powerful to be able to carry on.

    Reply
    1. Lisa Qualls
      March 6, 2014

      Thank you, Deborah. Sometimes I feel so weak and wonder why I can't handle this with more grace. I appreciate your empathy.

      Reply
      1. blesseday
        March 7, 2014

        "why I can't handle this with more grace."

        Lisa, you dear woman–you EMBODY grace. I didn't say perfection. But GRACE.

        May Christ rule in your heart and home this weekend! : )

        Reply
  6. Erika
    March 6, 2014

    As hard as a crocodile bites. Yeah ouch.. gee one smart little boy can we hear what he says when he is a dad one day? 😉 so true isn't it. Praying for your family and you have a great wonderful weekend. Praise God Dimples is coming home for the weekend. yay.

    God bless you all

    Reply
    1. Lisa Qualls
      March 6, 2014

      Thanks, Erika. We're getting geared up and I think it will be a good visit.

      Reply
  7. Tracy Barton-Niles
    March 7, 2014

    I love how our other children come along side us and encourage us…they are doing the work of Jesus! I went thru this very same thing last weekend with out daughter, she came home for a pass and it was her birthday. I wanted the homemade cake just right, time for shopping and sit down time, but with all of the other day to day stuff I fell behind and was literally baking the day of. However, once we sat down and enjoyed homemade leftovers for lunch and sang her a quiet family only Happy Birthday…the smile was worth it. BUT I get you…so much planning just for that 7 hour visit! Thank you for being a mirror for my life. It seems we are walking a similar path between your dimples and my red. May God be with you each step of the way…and I know that He is! I walk forward in obedience as well. This is a difficult season. But your words are like Manna!

    Reply
    1. Lisa Qualls
      March 7, 2014

      Tracy, I'm so glad my journey is a comfort and help to you; sometimes it feels like we are alone in this experience of residential treatment. I'm glad to know that you "get it" – all of the anticipation, worry, hope, wrapped up into one weekend. I'm glad your daughter's birthday went well and you had a good visit.

      Reply
  8. Erika Greig Stanley
    March 7, 2014

    Hi Lisa, I read day 5 of the "Refreshing Words" book today. It was just what I needed! Praying for a smooth weekend for you. Little man's words reminded me of what my four year old daughter said the other day. "Big Brother is so mean to you mommy, but you are always nice to him." Isn't it amazing what these kids notice? It was a huge blessing to hear those words from her. For one, I don't feel very nice, and two, what a lesson she learned – love even those who aren't nice to you.
    May God give you all you need this weekend!

    Reply
    1. Lisa Qualls
      March 7, 2014

      Thank you, Erika. I am loving Refreshing Words and wish I could mail it out to all of my readers. I wonder what the postage would be on that 🙂 You are teaching your daughter about loving even when it is so hard. You're a good mamma, Erika.

      Reply

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