I Need a Little Hope Here

I was on the stairs when I heard Little Man call, “I need a little help here!”

As I rounded the corner into the kitchen, I saw him standing on tiptoes atop the kitchen counter, arms reaching to keep a bowl from toppling off the top of the refrigerator.  Eyes big and arms straining, he was doing all that he could to keep it from tumbling down and shattering on the floor.

The last few days I’ve been feeling a bit like Little Man.  I’m trying to keep everything from collapsing, but doubting my ability to do it.  I find myself thinking, “I need a little hope here.”

The girls returned from camp Friday afternoon, and all morning I found myself worrying.  How was Dimples going to do back at home?  How would she greet me? How long would we make it before we hit a downward spiral?  How was I going to fill this week with the constant structure and activity she requires?

I was literally on my knees praying before I went to pick them up, asking God to restore my hope in her healing.  As I prayed I knew I just didn’t have it – I couldn’t even muster it up.  Then the truth hit me; my hope is not in my parenting skills, or in a therapist, or school , or reading the right book.  Although all of those can certainly help.

My hope is in Jesus.  He has never, ever failed me.  He has never left me.  He knows every detail of my life and He still loves me.  And He loves Dimples.

If you are in need of some encouragement, take a look at Notes on Hope.  I read it today and was encouraged; you might be too.

We are counting down the days until Russ and Isaiah get home from Kenya.  I posted a new picture and update on my One Thankful Mom Facebook page yesterday, if you would like to see it.  Together with the Kenyan team, they dug their deepest well yet, and are covered with mud to prove it.

I’ll close with this quote which I sent to a friend today, and then realized that I probably need it more than she does.

My feelings are not God. God is God. My feelings do not define truth. God’s word defines truth. My feelings are echoes and responses to what my mind perceives. And sometimes – many times – my feelings are out of sync with the truth. When that happens – and it happens every day in some measure – I try not to bend the truth to justify my imperfect feelings, but rather, I plead with God: Purify my perceptions of your truth and transform my feelings so that they are in sync with the truth.
― John Piper

Have a wonderful Sunday.

Lisa

 

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Let me introduce myself. Russ and I are the parents of twelve children by birth and adoption, and sometimes more through foster care. I'm the creator of One Thankful Mom which has been as much of a gift to me as to my readers. In 2011 I became a TBRI® Pracitioner* and have lived and breathed connected parenting ever since. I'm deeply honored to be the co-author, together with the late Dr. Karyn Purvis, of The Connected Parent; it is her final written work. I love speaking at events for adoptive and foster parents. I'm also the co-founder of The Adoption Connection, a podcast and resource site for adoptive moms. I mentor and encourage adoptive moms so you can find courage and hope in your journeys of loving your children well.

0 Comments

  1. Nancy
    June 25, 2012

    Thank you, Lisa.
    Thank you.
    nancy

    Reply
  2. Michelle Carper
    June 25, 2012

    Can I just tell you how thankful I am for you. I needed to hear so much of this today. My fears have consumed me related to the next downward spiral and when it will be. We have had over 2 weeks without one and we almost don't know what to do but I find myself daily worrying about the next one verses praising God. Fear that we can't send our daughter anywhere or allow any interaction with the past because she will tank consumes me at times. I totally put hope in myself and my controlled environment verses in Christ. Thank you for reminding me. We are preparing to send her to camp in 2 weeks. I am so insanely fearful of doing this…yesterday talking myself out of it because I feel like I am setting her up to fail knowing the environment has the perfect mix of boys, freedom and over stimulation. But I feel like God is saying I have to allow Him to be in control, not me.

    Also…sad how much in my marriage my feeling become God and define truth. 🙁 Thank you for reminding me of this. Love how God works. Seems like this is meant just for me related to timing!

    Reply
  3. Lisa H.
    June 27, 2012

    Looking for that other post, I read this…LOVE the quote!

    Reply

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