Fifteen Texts a Grieving Friend Might Like to Receive


I’m not an authority an authority on grief. In fact, I’m stumbling through it most of the time. The support of family and friends has kept me going on many days. Just last week, when I was overwhelmed with sorrow, a sweet friend came by with flowers, a colorful balloon, and a mocha.

Many days I want to be alone, and I’m often hesitant to answer the phone, but texts are easy to receive. If you have a friend who is in a difficult time, a few simple words might be just what she needs.

cross with flowers

Here are 15 texts that she might like to receive.

1. You are on my mind today.

2. I’m thinking of your child and how much she made me smile.

3. I’m on my way over to drop off dinner. I’ll leave it on the porch if you don’t answer the door.

4. How is your heart today? Would you like me to stop by?

5. I prayed for you this morning,

6. I’m wearing orange (or another color) today and remembering your child. (Orange was Kalkidan’s favorite color.)

7. Can I help you address thank you notes?

8. I have your child’s picture on my refrigerator and think of your family often.

9. Would you like me to pick up the extra vases from flowers that were delivered and donate them for you?

10. I’m running errands. What can I pick up for you?

11. Is there something I can help you do in memory of your child?

12. I’d like to have your kids over Friday night so you can have time with your husband (or alone).

13. We ate the spiciest food last night and all I could think about is how much your child would have liked it. (Kalkidan loved spicy food – other children might like tangy foods or something else.)

14. I read this verse and thought it might encourage you.

15. I know this is hard for you – and I care about you.

We worry so much about saying the wrong thing, that we often say nothing at all. Send a text and let your friend know you care.

with hope and gratitude,

signature Lisa and Bezagrief



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Let me introduce myself. Russ and I are the parents of twelve children by birth and adoption, and sometimes more through foster care. I'm the creator of One Thankful Mom which has been as much of a gift to me as to my readers. In 2011 I became a TBRI® Pracitioner* and have lived and breathed connected parenting ever since. I'm deeply honored to be the co-author, together with the late Dr. Karyn Purvis, of The Connected Parent; it is her final written work. I love speaking at events for adoptive and foster parents. I'm also the co-founder of The Adoption Connection, a podcast and resource site for adoptive moms. I mentor and encourage adoptive moms so you can find courage and hope in your journeys of loving your children well.

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