Dimples’ Farewell

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We walked into the cottage after the long drive to Montana, and one of the first things I heard was one staff member say to another, “I’m really going to miss that kid.” Those words characterized Dimples’ entire farewell.

Dimples “Goodbye Ceremony” was lovely. All of the children from her cottage were present, and many of the staff. She also invited the chaplain and a couple of kids from other cottages who were close friends. Her therapist lit a candle and spoke of Dimples, how she had grown, the hard work she had done in therapy, difficult moments, successes, and overall affirmed Dimples for the progress she made. Then she lit the candle of the cottage case manager who shared her thoughts, who then lit the candle of her closest staff member who spoke more affirming words.

The flame was passed to the chaplain who spoke of Dimples’ growth in her faith. He told a great story of her speaking to a group of ladies from a church (I think) where she said, “I don’t like grace.” We all laughed at her honesty. He passed the flame to me and I shared a little bit about how we had come to the program and the hope we have for the restoration of our family as Dimples returns.

We blew the candles out and then went around the circle again. Dimples called on each person and they shared a favorite memory of her, than she shared one of them. The kids’ memories often had to do with tipping canoes over or other funny stories. I shared a memory about a family picture she drew in therapy that had given me a clearer picture of some of her struggle in our family.

Everyone hugged and asked her to keep in touch. We went to two other cottages where she said goodbye to other special staff. One of them hugged her and said, “You bring sunshine everywhere you go.” Those words made my heart so glad.

The most poignant moment was when she parted with her best friend from another cottage. Her friend wrote a touching letter to Dimples asking her to email once a week to stay in touch. Later Dimples told me that her friend asked her, “Do you think your family could adopt me too?”  She doesn’t have a family -I haven’t stopped thinking about her since. It breaks my heart.

Have a great day, friends. Many blessings to all of you.

Lisa

 

 

 

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Let me introduce myself. Russ and I are the parents of twelve children by birth and adoption, and sometimes more through foster care. I'm the creator of One Thankful Mom which has been as much of a gift to me as to my readers. In 2011 I became a TBRI® Pracitioner* and have lived and breathed connected parenting ever since. I'm deeply honored to be the co-author, together with the late Dr. Karyn Purvis, of The Connected Parent; it is her final written work. I love speaking at events for adoptive and foster parents. I'm also the co-founder of The Adoption Connection, a podcast and resource site for adoptive moms. I mentor and encourage adoptive moms so you can find courage and hope in your journeys of loving your children well.

18 Comments

  1. sleepyknitter
    August 27, 2014

    Your post makes me cry! I am so happy that Dimples had such a positive experience (overall) in her time in the program. Such a blessing. I am praying that she is bringing home with her the positive skills that she learned, and that she will bring home that "sunshine," too. Blessings! –Shawnee

    Reply
  2. Whitney
    August 27, 2014

    This brings tears to my eyes. God bless you all. So proud of Dimples.

    Reply
  3. Emily
    August 27, 2014

    This post makes me happy.

    Reply
  4. krisquinnlong
    August 27, 2014

    Oh my. So touching.
    I've been praying for you Lisa, during this next phase of transition.
    Kris

    Reply
  5. Nancy
    August 27, 2014

    Now that one had me in tears, Lisa! This road is full or turns and ups and downs. Often the only thing consistent is the inconsistency of it all. But this post tastes seems to breathe promise and an excitement for what's to come. And that is sweet indeed!

    Reply
  6. Lizzy
    August 27, 2014

    I have been following your story for a while, since before Dimples went into RTC, and am always happy to hear the updates from your crew.
    It's interesting that I am drawn to your story because I am not an adoptive parent or even a parent at all, but I am drawn to your postings as a story of faith and forgiveness. Through your journey I have gleaned many lessons on how God is present in our lives and we are beyond spent and think we can not possibly go on….if we lean onto HIM we will be able to survive our darkest days.

    May you continue to be blessed and a blessing and thank you for sharing your story with all of us.

    Reply
    1. Lisa Qualls
      August 27, 2014

      Lizzy, thank you for taking the time to comment. To think that our journey encourages you is a blessing to me. God is faithful.

      Reply
  7. prayingintruth
    August 28, 2014

    As far as the friend, continue to pray on it, as I know you have been. God is faithful to lead, whatever that path might be. Welcome home Dimples 🙂

    Reply
  8. Laurel
    August 28, 2014

    What a beautiful ceremony! Praying for your family's transition.

    Reply
  9. Jo Ann
    August 28, 2014

    So excited to hear this! I will continue to pray for your family's restoration.
    I work with a ministry that provides a chaplain to a local residential treatment facility and we would be interested in connecting with others who are doing the same type of work, as there does not seem to be a lot of people out there doing it. If you could pass on our website to the chaplain or share his info with us, that would be great. http://www.daysofhope.net

    Reply
    1. Lisa Qualls
      August 28, 2014

      Jo Ann, I sent an email to the chaplain with your contact information and website. I hope you two connect! Thanks for the comment.

      Reply
      1. chrishaughee
        August 29, 2014

        Jo Ann mentioned the blog, and I am glad she did. I hope you don't mind that I "googled" your blog. I am glad I have found you/Dimples here!

        Reply
        1. Lisa Qualls
          September 1, 2014

          Glad you found it, Chris. Welcome. Thank you for being such an important part of Dimples' life .

          Reply
  10. Lindsey
    August 30, 2014

    What an amazing story and family! Thank you for sharing your journey! I am the founded of a website/organization called Real Imprints (www.realimprints.org). It's a website dedicated to uplift, inspire, and empower individuals around the world. We would like to invite you to share your story on our website. We would be honored to feature it. Thank you for living a life of selflessness and goodness! and thank your for considering sharing your story with Real Imprints. If you are interested, we will share your blog on your story so people can continue to follow your journey and experiences. Thanks so much Liss! -Lindsey (lindsey@realimprints.org)

    Reply
  11. Tricia
    September 1, 2014

    Oh my. The last little bit got me. Prayers for Dimples' friend, and for each of you as you transition back into living together. Hugs from afar.

    Reply
  12. charity
    September 10, 2014

    So grateful for a time of positive progress for your family, I hope the honeymoon is long….while I too ache for her friend who needs a family, I couldn't help but think it may be good for dimples to hear a friend desire what she has, perhaps it will help remind her how much of a blessing it is to have a family who wants to work on the hard things and have you return to the circle? praying for you all..

    Reply
  13. Sadee
    September 30, 2014

    Tears! Tears! Tears! So, so grateful!! Thank you for sharing your journey with us….and I'm so amazed at the goodness of God. I admire you so much for your courage to get the help that Dimples and all of you needed….we are all learning from you, Lisa – and God is revealed as so, so precious through your journey…..love and prayers from a stranger in Indiana! 😉

    Reply
    1. Lisa Qualls
      September 30, 2014

      Sadee, thank you for rejoicing with us. I'm still marveling every day over what God is doing.

      Reply

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