Many of us are familiar with the popular verses written about love in 1 Corinthians 13. We read that,
4 Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant 5 or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; 6 it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. 7 Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. 8 Love never ends…
These verses are loaded with meaning, so much so that I’m stuck on the first three words, “Love is patient.” In the past, I thought about being patient for a period of time – a day, a week, or maybe a month? But the Lord showed me something last winter that I have been thinking about ever since.
I was worried about one of my children and how a decision might affect this child’s life. My mind was running to the future – months and years stretching out before us. I envisioned all of the painful possibilities and in my fear, I wanted to grab some false sense of control, and change this child right here and now.
Then I was struck by something. When God says, “Love is patient,” He is not talking about a short period of time, He may be speaking about years of patience. We tend to lock people in to the way we see them here and now, but God does not see them that way at all; He sees their entire life story stretching from beginning to end. He is writing our children’s stories with His mighty and gentle hand – they are not locked in to the present, but are always moving along the path of their lives.
What does this mean to me as a mother? Each of my children is on a journey. I need to be patient and lovingly allow the Lord to lead them, even when it is painfully slow or uncomfortable. While I must speak truth to them, after all, “love rejoices in the truth,” it is vital that I sit with them in their mess, right where they are, and let their story unfold.
We are mothers and fathers who know that, “Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.”
We must always trust that God loves our children far more than we do and while we would like to control their life stories, making them neat and tidy, we can’t deprive them of their own journey with God.
I am quite sure that when I was a teen, my parents feared I had ruined my life – and they were not alone. Looking back, we can now see that the trials in that season were part of my journey to becoming the woman and mother I am now.
Love is patient – may we be patient with our children, and the people we love, trusting that God is the Great Author. We can’t expect the beautiful ending when we’re still in the early chapters of the book – pray, wait, then pray some more.
Lisa
![I love starting my mornings here in my thrift store chair with coffee and a stack of books. My routine is simple and life giving: Bible (She Reads Truth app is fantastic for reading plans), a few sentences in my One-Line a Day Journal (the only journal I've ever managed to keep), one line in my gratitude journal, prayer, a chapter (or less) in a book for my personal/spiritual growth. Then I organize my day in my planner, all before I turn on my computer. I try not to even look at my phone, other than my Bible app and texts (checking for texts from kids and family), before this is done, otherwise I'm quickly sucked into the vortex of social media, although it happens more often than I care to admit. Our world is so noisy, this little piece of my life is quiet. I'm reminded of who I am and whose I am; my priorities come more clearly into view - love God, love Russ, love my children, my family and friends, love the world. Do what God calls me to do with the gifts and resources he's given me. Live an open-hearted life. This all seems clearer when I start my mornings here. [I share this not because it's the right way to do it, but because there might be something here that speaks to you and is helpful. If so, take it. If not, that's fine. We learn so much from one another when we share our lives.]
#openhearted
#onethankfulmom
#couragedearheart #shereadstruth](http://scontent.cdninstagram.com/t51.2885-15/s320x320/sh0.08/e35/20214077_128237287780164_1933912572390539264_n.jpg "I love starting my mornings here in my thrift store chair with coffee and a stack of books. My routine is simple and life giving: Bible (She Reads Truth app is fantastic for reading plans), a few sentences in my One-Line a Day Journal (the only journal I've ever managed to keep), one line in my gratitude journal, prayer, a chapter (or less) in a book for my personal/spiritual growth. Then I organize my day in my planner, all before I turn on my computer. I try not to even look at my phone, other than my Bible app and texts (checking for texts from kids and family), before this is done, otherwise I'm quickly sucked into the vortex of social media, although it happens more often than I care to admit. Our world is so noisy, this little piece of my life is quiet. I'm reminded of who I am and whose I am; my priorities come more clearly into view - love God, love Russ, love my children, my family and friends, love the world. Do what God calls me to do with the gifts and resources he's given me. Live an open-hearted life. This all seems clearer when I start my mornings here. [I share this not because it's the right way to do it, but because there might be something here that speaks to you and is helpful. If so, take it. If not, that's fine. We learn so much from one another when we share our lives.]
#openhearted
#onethankfulmom
#couragedearheart #shereadstruth")
Yes! The story is not over yet, and oh how we need to enjoy this fruit of patience! Wonderful post Lisa. A good word for us mamas!
The fruit of the spirit – I need to think more about that. Thanks for the reminder, Beth.
Amen!
Thanks for this reminder Lisa. One that I was thirsty for. Hope you are doing well.
Great reminder both for my kids and myself.
Thank you for the reminder. I will remember this the next time I think, "We are home three years; why is this stuff still happening?" And also, “Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.” I may print these out and post them all over the house.
Three years feels like a long time when we're in the thick of it, but in light of a lifetime, it is very short. It is so hard to keep that perspective! Thanks, Karen.
Ouch. Hit me right between the eyes. I have been praying about patience – knowing how much I lack it in our present situation. Thank you for the encouragement!
I have read those verses in 1 Corinthians many times, but when you read them with a particular person and particular situation in mind they take on more weight. I’m with you – I can’t get past “love is patient”.
Wonderful post!
Thank you, Kayla. I'm glad it speaks to you.
Lisa, one thing that struck me a few years back was reading that the most faithful English rendering of the word "patient" in that verse is actually "long-suffering." That has created such a powerful mental image for me, helping me be ok with feeling like I am suffering for love sometimes.
I don't have hard relationships with my kids (other than what is normal for pre-teens) but I have been in a relationship with my mother-in-law that can only be described with "long-suffering." (18 years of marriage this fall.)
I tried to comment here in full, but WordPress did not like it, so I just put it on my own blog. If anyone has a spare moment this week and would like to come visit and share your wisdom about long-suffering in relationship with attachment-challenged, "stuck" adults, I would be thankful. : )
http://oblesseday.blogspot.com/2013/05/contemplat…
Your post is beautiful and a perfect example of how true this is in all of our relationships. Thank you so much.
So so good! Thank you for sharing this!
You are very welcome, Carmen.
Wow I love it when God does that. I so needed to read that verse. A completely different situation and yet in some ways exactly the same, just not with a child.
I think this is common to all people – we grow, we change, and God brings us into great maturity. My kids should be super thankful that I'm not the person I was when I started on this mothering adventure!
How timely. We sent our son of to Marine bootcamp in SC this morning. One last hug and I was left with nothing but patient love, learning to pray like never before. We patiently (okay not so much) had to love him through the process of finding some-thing to do, some way to start the next phase of his life. In the end, we have to trust God to protect and lead. We have to trust!
Jennifer, your son is on quite a maturing journey – and I imagine it will mature all of you in your faith. Trust, love, pray – that's what it comes down to so often with our young adult children.
Wow. I can't even explain how in needed to read this today. Like being slammed upside the head with a 2×4… Thank you.
You are so welcome, Cat. I think I owe you an email….
You are so right…I find it is much easier for me to be patient…and hopeful…about other people's children, my students. I have seen so many grow through difficult teenage years to become strong, kind people. But with my own children I am so fearful that things I may do or not do for them now will somehow interfere with that…my fear often prevents me from being as good a parent as I would like…I have been trying to focus on more walking with my children than directing them this week…thank you for this insight, I needed it.
That is so interesting, Margaret. It is fear that so often hinders me as a mother too, and unfortunately, when I get fearful, I come across as angry – which is not my intention at all! Parenting is a refining process.
Amen! I needed this today, too. Not for my children, but for others I love.
I'm so glad it is helpful to you.
What a beautiful post. Thank you.
You're welcome, Christy. Thank you for commenting.