Just How Patient is Our Love?
Sunday Gratitude
THINK
Parenting and Shame
Tuesday Topic: Coping With Rejection by Peers
So, How Was It?
Mother’s Day for the Brokenhearted
Home: Moving Forward
Anger is Powerful, Sorrow is Terrifying
One trip to Colorado, an unexpected drive home from Seattle (after my flight was canceled), a trip to Montana to visit Dimples, and now, I’m in Seattle with five of my kids. I nearly cried when I had to get in the car again on Wednesday. For a woman who loves to be home, this is downright painful.
The upside to every single trip is the wonderful people I get to be with, both in the car as we cross the miles, and when we arrive at our destinations.
One of my dearest friends wrote an entry in her journal last weekend and was vulnerable enough to share it with me. Written in the wake of the death of a young man she loved, it is raw and honest. While one mother grieves the loss of her son, my friend faces it with the knowledge that they could have easily exchanged places. She could be the one whose son is gone from this life.
Hear her tear-stained words.
If my son had any other illness there would be no shame or stigma attached to it. There would be support from friends, help from the medical profession, and hopeful treatments. People would understand. They would not be afraid to ask about him and they wouldn’t have “that” look in their eyes when they did – the look that says, “I’m sorry your son isn’t ‘normal’…that he is flawed, different, abnormal…somehow less than.”
This week’s Tuesday Topic comes from Carmen who writes the blog, Country Blessings. She asked,
We have adopted 4 children privately, the oldest was 3 when we adopted him, but now we are in the process of adopting a waiting child from our state. So most likely they will be older and possibly in school already. We have homeschooled our children in the past but currently have them enrolled in the public school.
My friend, Jody, gave a talk at the Embracing Orphans retreat that was anchored around this quote by Frederick Buechner,
Here is the world. Beautiful and terrible things will happen. Don’t be afraid.
I woke up this morning thinking about Jody standing in front of us telling her story in a gentle, vulnerable way.
A few weeks ago our friend, Emily, came to stay with the kids while we went on our trip to visit Dimples. The trip was canceled due the unfortunate discovery of a DVT in my leg, but thankfully Emily stayed and cheered us up with her presence. We had a marathon appointment with the hematologist that week and Emily ran the household, including homeschooling the youngest three.
Shamelessly stealing my kids' FB photos - Hannah's walk to work 4/11.
The days keep flying by, filled with quite a few tough things, to be perfectly honest. I am definitely not loving the way this feels, but I am really loving the Lord and feeling a need to draw closer.
I’m the only one awake, so let’s be really quiet and I’ll give you a quick update. I can’t believe how many days it has been since I opened up my computer and clicked “new post” on my site. I miss my blog and I miss all of you. By the way, don’t you love this photo Isaiah took?
The Embracing Orphans Retreat in Estes Park, Colorado was great. True confession, it was the first women’s retreat I’ve ever attended. Can you believe that?
I was pouring a cup of coffee when my friend called. She asked if I had a minute to talk and when I answered, “Yes,” her resolve quickly faded and she began to cry. She told me about a conflict with her newly adopted son that had occurred the night before. Despite her best intentions, she was convinced that she had failed to handle it well. Then she said these words that made me catch my breath – they were all too familiar: “I used to be a good mom.”
We were sitting at the dining room table with friends when the phone rang. I got up to answer and was surprised to hear Dimples say, “Hi Mom!” She called to wish us Happy Easter. Like every Easter, she knew we had a gathering of friends in our home, and I think she missed being here. This is the first time we’ve had an unplanned call, and it was very sweet for everyone.
Yesterday Eby asked our friend, Emily, if Dimples’ school is like jail. That broke my heart! I thought we had explained things pretty well; we’ve talked about the school, the cottage she lives in with other kids, the gym where she plays basketball, X-country ski trips, and more.
But when you’re seven and your sister goes away, it’s pretty hard to make sense of it. It’s challenging for all of us.
