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We have a Sunday night tradition we all enjoy. Since we have our big dinner with the entire family in the afternoon, our evening meal is usually popcorn, cheese, and fruit. I like this for about 25 different reasons, one of which is that the kids make it themselves, and there is nearly no clean-up.

Russ was always the popcorn maker in our family. Years ago he mastered the art of popping it on the stove in our largest pot. I, however, preferred the ease of microwave popcorn…the problem was that I knew the bright yellow color and other chemicals weren’t good for us. I just didn’t want to deal with the hassle of making it in the big pot.

Enter the Wabash Valley Farms 25008 Whirley-Pop Stovetop Popcorn Popper- which transformed our Sunday nights.

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Today marks two months since I made my last trip to Montana and brought Dimples back with me.

Since that day Dimples has moved home, transitioned to a new school, played a season of volleyball, joined the youth group, and made new friends. She has reconnected with special people who were part of her support team before she went to residential treatment. Most of all, she has settled into the family.

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Owlhaven is one of the very first blogs I read when we were beginning our adoption journey. Mary Ostyn, has been writing Owlhaven a few months longer than I’ve been writing One Thankful Mom. Over the years we’ve become friends and a few weekends ago we spent three days together on a retreat with a small group of other adoptive moms.

Last spring Mary asked if I would read her new book, Forever Mom: What to Expect When You’re Adopting, and if I liked it,  write an endorsement. I was so honored – and so busy, with Noah and Katie’s wedding coming up. It took me a couple of weeks, but once I sat down to read, I couldn’t stop. I know my friends are amazing, so I expected to like Mary’s book, but I had no idea just how fantastic it would be.

photo credit: samuel qualls

photo credit: samuel qualls

giving thanks #1511 – 1520

a Saturday that stretched before us – no travel, meetings, or appointments

warm weather while we worked in the yard 

Russ’ happiness at a day spent outdoors

kids cheerfully (for the most part) working with us

 

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Two days at UW, multiple appointments, testing, interviews, and finally a team meeting around the conference table. The final report – Eby’s sensory differences are significant, he has some speech challenges , and trauma is still a big factor influencing his life.

As I listened to the team talk about their findings, my hope drained away. I wanted to hear something I didn’t already know – something I could hang my concerns on, something that would seem solvable. I sat in the room thinking, “I filled out loads of paperwork, waited eight months for an appointment, and spent four days on this trip, only to find out the same old stuff.” I was holding back tears when we left.

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giving thanks #1491 – 1510

major progress on prepping for our garage remodel

folks from our care group who spent hours working with us yesterday

a nearly empty (for the first time in 15 years) garage

storage bins on clearance

gathering as a family last night to celebrate Little Man’s 8th birthday (which is tomorrow)

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Well, that was quite a surprise. I didn’t expect yesterday’s post, Have We Made Attachment an Idol, to gain so much  attention; in fact when I clicked the “publish” button, I was nervous about how it would be received. Apparently it struck a chord with many of you who have pondered this as well.

I want to be clear about something. Secure attachment is beautiful – it is a good thing to desire for our children. God wired children’s brains to attach to their parents, but as we know, sometimes that wiring is damaged due to neglect, abuse, and trauma of all kinds.

Love my girls!

I spent last weekend with a small group of adoptive moms who are all ministry leaders; the time was deeply meaningfulOur conversations were rich, faith-filled, and honest. What a relief it was to know that we are not alone in our challenges, purposes, and joys.

One topic we wrestled with is attachment. We have all studied attachment theory and methods for facilitating its development. With some of our children, secure attachment has been achieved, while with others, it has not – all within one family. Among our children who came home at older ages, it has been more difficult to achieve.

Dimples - May 2007

Dimples – May 2007

It’s been ages since I’ve posted a Tuesday Topic and I’ve missed hearing from all of you. The accumulated wisdom here is remarkable and I love seeing us help one another. Today’s question should have been posted a few weeks ago when I received it, but it is so relevant that I’m going to share it now and look forward to hearing your thoughts, experiences, and encouragement. It comes from Natalia who writes,

We have two foster girls (3 and 5) who have been with us for about 5 months. Both of them will be starting preschool/pre-kindergarten in the next couple of weeks and as they enter into the school year I am anticipating a lot of “getting to know you” activities in their classrooms

 

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I have this thing about writing with pencils. I used to write everything with black ink, but the more children I had, the more necessary it was to make adjustments, rearrange, reschedule, and sometime scratch things right off my calendar and to-do list. When I couldn’t stand the mess of changes continually happening in my life, I began to write with pencils; at least with a pencil, I could erase and write in the new plan.